This weekend we were talking and it somehow came up that Ant has never seen one of those creepy thousand legger bug things that can crawl faster than I can run. He kept wanting to know the name of them, but all I've ever called them is "those creepy thousand leg bug things that run really fast." I know they're all over the East Coast...do they not have them in CA?
Normally, with the exception of mosquitoes, I don't mind bugs all that much. But I can't stand these things! I have an amazingly irrational fear of them. One time while living in the charming little community of Bethlehem, PA, (it really is charming, especially around Christmastime) I stooped down to pick up a piece of fuzz off the carpet, and it turned out to be one of these bugs and I have to tell you guys, I damn near had a heart attack.


So this morning I come into my classroom, open up the closet door, and what do I see? Yup. There it was, staring right at me. I know they're harmless, but man do they freak me the hell out!

And of course, you know the little bastard is going to wait until I have a classroom full of sissies to crawl out and make an appearance. And that's exactly what it did. You have never seen or heard 10 4th graders behave in such a manner. I swear, the Japanese were a thousand times calmer when Godzilla showed up. I wasn't much better, though. I literally ran to the other side of the room while repeating to myself, "YOU ARE THE GROWN-UP!! YOU CAN'T CLIMB ON TOP OF THE DESKS!! YOU ARE THE GROWN-UP!!..."

I pulled it together long enough to remind the students of my WE DON'T KILL THINGS JUST BECAUSE WE'RE BIGGER THAN THEY ARE rule.

But we will use our workbooks to swoosh it under the door to Tim Teacher's class, then count the seconds until the 3rd graders freak out. :-)

8 comments:

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

Yeah, I hate those guys, too. That's what we called them in Philadelphia, too: Thousand-leggers.

Good thing you got a pic because now Ant can see one too.

You sure are broadening his horizons, sister.

And you know why?

Cos you're a broad.

Melanie said...

LMAO, I hate those things too! They're all the way out in Korea, but not in CA? Not only do they run fast, but they're awesome swimmers too? I saw squish 'em! lol

Dani said...

I would rather face gang bangers then those.......I friggin hate creepy crawly thingys....I am much better facing being shot, tortured or confined.

YUCK!!!!

Rookie on the Run said...

LMAO!! Funny story!

I've never seen one of those. I live in California... so maybe they don't like it here. That's good, because those things are nasty looking!

Last year, when I was teaching 3rd grade, I used to sometimes get black widows in or near my classroom. I [insert expletive here] HATE those things!! Like you, I have been in a classroom of shrieking, scrambling kids. Major chaos!

I had the custodian and/or the principal kill them... no shooing under the door for me. :)

rockstar said...

UGH! You have them all the way over there!? We have them in our house and are trying to find a spray to get rid of them that won't be harmful to the kitties.

Jason HATES them. He kept trying to kill one the other day, but was so scared that he couldn't do the damn thing scurried into the basement through a crack in the linen closet.

There was one in the tub this morning and he wound up taking a shower with it until the water forced it down the drain.

raulgonemobile said...

Ah, the centipede. What an interesting looking critter. I think that one is a Scutigera Coleoptrata.
(No, I'm really not that smart, I just poked around Wikipedia until I found something looking like that)

Good job on the whole not killing it because you're bigger. props to you for that

Jes said...

Yeah. If I started killing things just because they're smaller than me, my 1st graders would be toast. :-)